Say What!
by WildcatYST
Summary: The gang gets the wrong idea when Kagome and Miroku have been behind closed doors for awhile. What are those noises?...


All right! Thanks for reading this humble little fic. A few warnings. This fic has some sexual lingo and of course Inuyasha's mouth. Please be forewarned that this fic is of a sexual nature! Please let me know what you think. This isn't for the contest or anything, just for your enjoyment. It happens to be my first Kagome / Miroku fic. Well, the first completed Inuyasha fic of mine. Just a one shot. Enjoy!  
  
Say What?!  
  
Lonely Soldier  
  
Shippo looked up from his pages of brightly colored pictures. He had drawn several pictures of Kagome and himself, with the occasional Sango and Miroku in the background. Inuyasha never appeared in his drawings because he was too mean to his surrogate mother. His attention shifted to the closed door in front of him. It had been almost an hour since Kagome and the monk Miroku disappeared behind it and neither had come out.  
  
Setting his bright orange crayon down, Shippo decided to investigate. He couldn't hear what was going on because Inuyasha's ranting at Sango was blocking almost all sounds. Inuyasha was insisting on Sango fixing him ramen, but she refused to do so.  
  
"Damn woman! Fix my ramen!" Inuyasha screamed.  
  
"As long as we have this food we might as well use it. We'll save the ramen for later." Sango scolded as she fixed some soup and rice. Miroku had pulled another one of his stunts. This time he claimed there were ominous spirit demons lurking around the village and offered to place protection charms around. The villagers had offered them a place to stay and food for their service. Sango was cooking dinner tonight. Kagome had told her that there was something very important she needed to do and had asked if the exterminator would cover dinner duty. Sango had quickly agreed but was growing suspicious at the convenient disappearance of a certain monk.  
  
"Feh!" Inuyasha stormed off and sat in a corner Indian style.  
  
Shippo pressed his ear against the large door.  
  
"It's so big..." Kagome's voice drifted to his ears. "There's no way it will fit."  
  
"Yes it will." Miroku's voice insisted. Shippo could hear the shifting of clothing. His innocent mind was reeling with questions. What was going on? A few moments of shifted movements and a squeaking noise. The ruffling of clothes made Shippo think of heavy robes being tossed to the ground.  
  
"It is a tight fit." Miroku said aloud thoughtfully.  
  
"Wrong hole!" Kagome chided.  
  
"Oh!"  
  
More movements. Shippo leaned closer to the door. What was that squeaking noise? Miroku's breathing was labored. He heard Kagome's back unzip.  
  
"We need protection." Kagome's voice whispered.  
  
"Of course. Wouldn't want any accidents." Miroku said slyly.  
  
Protection? Shippo questioned himself silently. What do they need protection from? His curiosity made him continue to listen even though he didn't quite understand what was going on.  
  
"What are you doing?"Inuyasha demanded of Shippo. Sango decided to ignore them. If Inuyasha was bothering Shippo then that meant he wasn't bothering her.  
  
"Something's going on." Shippo pressed his ear against the door again. "Miroku and Kagome are in there. I can't figure out what's going on." The little fox kit whined.  
  
"WHAT?!" Inuyasha was at the door in a flash. He pressed his ears against the door. He heard a squeaking sound. Was that a bed?  
  
"Harder." Kagome's voice demanded.  
  
"I'm trying as hard as I can." Miroku replied.  
  
"You can do it better than that!" Kagome encouraged in her sweet and happy tone.  
  
Inuyasha listened intently. This couldn't be right. What the hell are they doing?! His mind screamed. Both the hanyou and the kitsune pressed close to the door to listen.  
  
"What are you two doing?" Sango stood threateningly behind them.  
  
"What are we doing?" Inuyasha snapped. "What are THEY doing?!" He pressed his ear back to the door. Sango watched with fascination as emotions crossed their faces. Shippo looked mostly confused but still worried. Inuyasha was grinding his teeth together as if he were trying to smooth out his fangs.  
  
"It isn't right to pry in other people's business." Sango lifted her nose in disgust at the eavesdropping. When Inuyasha and Shippo both suddenly paled, Sango couldn't help but press her own ear against the door.  
  
"Now that's better..." Kagome praised.  
  
"You really like it?" Miroku questioned.  
  
"Yeah! It's really good!" Kagome joyously shouted. "You are the best at this, Miroku!"  
  
"I do what I can to please a woman." Miroku added.  
  
That was it. Inuyasha was practically seeing red. The strange sounds, the squeaking of a bed, the words between them...there was only one thing he could do. Inuyasha raised a hand in the air and brought his sharp claws across the door. Upon impact it gave way and all three of the eavesdroppers fell through the shredded door and landed in a disgraceful heap just inside the door.  
  
Kagome gasped in shock. Shippo tried to see around the hand Sango had placed before his eyes as the door crashed open. She didn't want a child to see this. Inuyasha was scrambling to his feet ready to kill when he actually looked up at Miroku and Kagome.  
  
Kagome was sitting on the floor with a big piece of paper laid out in front of her. There were many pictures in black and white all over the paper. Miroku had placed his heavy outer robes on the bed and was standing in clothes suitable for work. He was kneeling on the floor with a modern looking tool in his hand and a pair of gloves to keep his hands from being cut by some of the sharper pieces of metal lying around. In front of him was a shiny red machine. It looked like the pink bicycle Kagome often brought with her, only it was much smaller and had two extra wheels on the back.  
  
"Inuyasha!" Kagome shouted in protest. "What did you have to go and do that for?" She looked halfway between enraged and close to breaking out into tears.  
  
"We thought...weren't you...but you and him..." Inuyasha stuttered as he searched for the right words.  
  
"We were what?" Miroku cocked an elegant eyebrow upwards in question.  
  
"Those noises! And the squeaking! It was the bed, I know it!" Inuyasha protested.  
  
"We were building this tricycle for Shippo!" Kagome shouted. "Miroku said he would help me. The squeaking was just him turning the bolts and screws."  
  
"But you said that something was in the wrong hole." Shippo's voice whined.  
  
"An easy mistake to make." Miroku's implied meaning made Kagome blush. "Kagome was giving me instructions and I was trying to build it. There were lots of rods that had to go in the right hole for it to work." He calmly explained, not bothering to hide the grin that spread across his face. "And it took a lot of strength to screw them in right." Another grin reached his features.  
  
"But I don't understand. What did you think they were doing?" The kit turned innocent eyes towards Inuyasha.  
  
Inuyasha didn't have a chance to answer before Sango grabbed them both and dragged them out of the room mumbling something about perverted monks and crazy hanyous.  
  
"Thanks again Miroku." Kagome smiled at the monk, who was in the process of adorning his robes again. She started to gather the tools scattered about the room.  
  
"I had been wondering what the huge box you were carrying in your bag was." Miroku helped her fold the instructions and put them in the box as trash. A couple of moments of silence passed before Miroku smiled. "You owe me." The mischievous grin covered his face again.  
  
"I know." Kagome sighed. She couldn't help but laugh at the look on Miroku's face.  
  
"Please?" He asked. Kagome eyed him. "It would be my honor..." Miroku smiled again. Kagome laughed and gave in.  
  
"Fine." She laughed again when Miroku's hand reached her with lightening speed and grabbed her butt in it's usual way. He gave it a squeeze before Kagome swatted his hand away. "Don't give them any ideas!"  
  
"Who says they don't already have ideas?" Miroku joked as he pulled his hand away. Kagome smiled.  
  
"You know what I mean." She chided and walked back into the room with a steaming hanyou, a kitsune busy coloring, and a demon exterminator all attempting to ignore the situation that had just occurred.  
  
"Can't keep a monk from dreaming." Miroku replied. His eyes lingered on her swaying hips as Kagome walked away. "But watching you walk away is always worth the view." He got a crayon thrown in his face for the comment and a glare from an unhappy Shippo.  
  
"Hentai." Kagome mumbled before approaching Shippo.  
  
But I'm your hentai... Miroku let a grin spread across his face as he watched the object of his affections bend over to look at one of Shippo's drawings. Ahhh...always worth the view.  
  
--END-- 


End file.
